~~Am I Not Supposed to be Happy?: Life Post~~

Hey there, yes it's me.

Angel.

The girl who seems to be so incredibly broken.

So beautifully shattered.

So beautiful outside as in.

"Ye, my love is most beautiful, when she cries."

Someone I used to know wrote that....

About me.

Am I not supposed to be happy with what my life is?

Am I not supposed to have dry eyes and never stop smiling?

Am I not supposed to feel lucky and blessed for all the good in my life?

Right now I'm anything but.

And you may ask why this is, why I'm crying so hard as the hour gets so close to two am, why I'm breaking.

When I have such a good life.

When I've gone across the entire world.

When I'm so perfect.

Why can someone who brings so much light into others be so broken herself?

It's simple.

It's love....

Love that keeps fucking breaking me.

Such a treasured emotion.

So sweet until you realize it's poison.

Poison for me especially...

I don't even know why I keep trying for it when it's hurt me so much already....

I'm just glad I'm not alone.